Perinatal Anxiety and Depression

Perinatal Anxiety and Depression: The Quiet Struggle We Need to Talk About

Pregnancy and the postpartum period are often painted as a time of glowing joy, deep connection, and blissful anticipation. And while those moments can be real and beautiful, they are not the whole story. For many parents, this season also comes with overwhelming fear, sadness, and emotional distress that feels confusing, isolating, and heavy.

Perinatal anxiety and depression affect people during pregnancy and up to a year after birth—and they are far more common than most of us realize.

What Does “Perinatal” Mean?

The term perinatal includes both:

• Prenatal (during pregnancy)

• Postpartum (after birth)

Perinatal mood and anxiety disorders (often abbreviated as PMADs) can occur at any point during this time. Postpartum depression tends to get the most attention, but anxiety during pregnancy or after birth is just as prevalent—and just as deserving of care.

More Than “Baby Blues”

Many people experience temporary mood swings, irritability, or tearfulness in the first days after birth, often referred to as the “baby blues.” These feelings usually resolve on their own within a couple of weeks.

Perinatal anxiety and depression are different.

They last longer, feel more intense, and can interfere with daily functioning, relationships, and the ability to enjoy life—or even feel safe inside your own thoughts.

What Perinatal Depression Can Look Like

Perinatal depression doesn’t always look like constant crying. It can be subtle, quiet, and easy to dismiss—especially when everyone expects you to be happy.

Some common signs include:

• Persistent sadness, emptiness, or numbness

• Feeling disconnected from your baby or loved ones

• Guilt, shame, or feeling like a “bad parent”

• Loss of interest in things you once enjoyed

• Changes in sleep or appetite beyond what’s expected with a newborn

• Hopelessness or thoughts of “this will never get better”

What Perinatal Anxiety Can Look Like

Anxiety is often overlooked, even though it’s extremely common during pregnancy and postpartum.

It may show up as:

• Constant worry that feels impossible to turn off

• Racing thoughts or a sense of impending doom

• Fear of something terrible happening to your baby

• Intrusive or unwanted thoughts that feel disturbing

• Physical symptoms like heart palpitations, dizziness, nausea, or tightness in the chest

• Trouble sleeping even when the baby is asleep

Many parents with anxiety are told they’re just being “overprotective” or that it’s “normal to worry”—which can make them doubt their own experience and delay seeking help.

Why This Happens (And Why It’s Not Your Fault)

Perinatal anxiety and depression are not personal failures. They are not caused by weakness, lack of gratitude, or doing something “wrong.”

They can be influenced by:

• Hormonal changes

• Sleep deprivation

• A history of anxiety or depression

• Traumatic birth experiences

• Pregnancy complications or NICU stays

• Lack of support

• Major life transitions and identity shifts

Even people with supportive partners, healthy pregnancies, and planned babies can struggle.

The Cost of Silence

Because of stigma and unrealistic expectations of parenthood, many people suffer in silence. They smile at appointments, reassure friends they’re “fine,” and push through—often feeling ashamed that they’re not enjoying what’s “supposed to be the happiest time of their life.”

Silence makes these conditions heavier. Talking about them makes space for relief.

Help Is Available—and It Works

The most important thing to know is this: perinatal anxiety and depression are treatable.

Support may include:

• Therapy (especially with a provider trained in perinatal mental health)

• Medication, when appropriate and carefully considered

• Support groups with other parents who truly get it

• Practical help with sleep, feeding, and daily tasks

Early support can make a profound difference—not just for the parent, but for the entire family.

If You’re Struggling Right Now

If you recognize yourself in any of this, you are not alone—and you are not broken.

You deserve care, compassion, and support just as much as anyone else. Reaching out for help is not a sign of failure; it’s a sign of strength and self-respect.

If you’re able, consider telling one safe person how you’re really doing. If you need professional help, a primary care provider, midwife, OB-GYN, or mental health professional can be a starting point.

And if you’re ever experiencing thoughts of harming yourself or feel unsafe, please seek immediate help through local emergency services or a crisis support line in your country.

Changing the Narrative

Perinatal anxiety and depression thrive in secrecy—but healing grows in honesty.

By talking openly, listening without judgment, and offering real support instead of platitudes, we can change the narrative around pregnancy and postpartum life. We can make room for the full range of experiences—not just the polished, picture-perfect ones.

Parenthood is transformative. It is also hard. And no one should have to navigate it alone.